My Body is a Wonderland


When I came home after 1 year of traveling around Europe, I had lost a considerable amount of weight. I hadn’t really noticed it until my clothes literally started to fall off. I’ve always LOVED the way I looked because I’ve never considered myself fat or thin. I have always been perfectly proportionate to my body type. I’m tall with HUGE boobs, legs for days and no ass.

That’s me and it’s what I’m comfortable with.

Now I’m tall, a bit thin, huge boobs, legs for days and still no ass. TMI, but during my last period my back was in some serious pain. My boobs were swollen and my roommate immediately thought, “Well, your frame is smaller, and your body is getting used to holding that weight now.” I objected to this hypothesis, but then after some serious thought, I thought, what if she’s right?

Nashiva continued, “Well, your frame is smaller, so all of your weight is concentrated in one area = boobs. Before, you had more weight around your waist, hips and thighs, so it was better distributed throughout your body.” Who asked her anyways?!? I don’t get it!

I really just DIDN’T want to understand. I didn’t expect that one could lose weight without focusing on wanting to lose weight. I wasn’t working out. I wasn’t following diets. Instead, I ate locally, I went outside and walked around the streets of Florence and really took advantage of the wine.

So it’s not about how my body changed, but my attitude towards it. Does it matter how one loses or gains weight? To some, maybe, but to me, as long as I am a happy and healthy me, what else could I ask for? We fixate on superficial ideals of beauty instead of looking at what is already beautiful.

My body is my wonderland. It changes on a daily basis, goes through awful pain, yet I love it all the same. I have much to discover. Every inch of my skin embodies softness combined with discoloration due to my history of eczema. Something about the way my hair never curls in the exact place I want it to or the shape my body creates in the perfect pair of jeans. As I look through the looking glass I couldn’t wonder more about this body that I adore!

– J

March’s self-love writing prompt is the Body Path. You can share your self-love journey with the Love Warrior Community by submitting your self-love posts to be published here on Self-Love Warrior, or you can share them on the Self-Love Diet Facebook page.

About jaelisawesome

I am currently a senior at Randolph College, founded as Randolph-Macon Woman's College in 1891, majoring in Political Science: International Relations with minors in Spanish and Studio Art. Born and raised in Richmond, Virginia I believe that I have significant contributions to make to the world of diplomacy and US foreign policy. As Student Government President I am the liaison between the students and the faculty and administration, as well as the student representative to the Board of Trustees. I also serve as the Co-President of an all female a cappella group Songshine. I am known for being involved in any and every aspect at school. Some of my passions include playing on the volleyball and tennis teams, singing in almost every group at my school, performing in my very first musical Spring Awakening in the theatre department to taking orders as a barista at the schools’ coffee shop Main Grounds. After I graduate in May 2012, I aspire to attend the Master of Arts in Political Science with a concentration in European Union Policy Studies one-year, 33-credit graduate program. The intensive, residential program is based wholly in Florence, Italy and results in an MA degree in Political Science from James Madison University. My goal is to spread the Love Warrior Community, meaning more people actively bringing self-love into their lives and into the lives of others, more people accepting and loving themselves as they are and more people empowered to follow their passions and share them with the world. The Love Warrior Community is as strong as those involved. By joining the Love Warrior Community, I have the opportunity to create my own self-love practice, bringing more love into my life and the lives of those around me. I will be able to influence a greater number of people and help them to see their value and worth beyond their bodies.
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