Self-Love Diet Tip #4: Confront Your Thoughts

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The Self-Love Diet offers you a lifetime of loving thoughts, emotions, actions and relationships. But how do you begin?

Yesterday I went over step number one in the 5-Step Process, catching your thoughts. Today I will go over step number two in the 5-Step Process, confronting your thought by asking, “Who says?”

The 5-Step Process

The Five-Step Process is a powerful Self-Love Diet tool to put in your Self-Love Diet tool box. This process is pivotal to creating loving thoughts for yourself and others.

Here are the 5 steps:

#1 Catch your thought.
#2 Confront your thought by asking, “Who says?”
#3 Replace the thought.
#4 Apologize to yourself.
#5 Commit to change.

I’ll go in depth on step two with you today. Once you have honed the first skill of developing your inner observer and are conscious enough of your thoughts to catch them when you think them, you are ready for step two: Confronting your thoughts.

Confronting Your Thought: Ask the question, “Who says?”

We think thousands of thoughts each day. Some are conscious and many others are just below our consciousness. We have to be careful to not believe every thought we think! A common experience for men and women is to look at their bodies and think something negative about its appearance. Notice your thoughts when you are getting out of the shower or getting dressed for the day. What are your thoughts about your body’s appearance?

I remember a time when my daughter who is almost 31 and has two daughters of her own was about 11 years old. She was on my bed as I was doing my “fashion show.” I was going to a wedding that day and was I trying on different dresses to see what I would ultimately wear. I had a pile of dresses on the bed and as I was looking in the mirror at myself with the most current dress on, my daughter asked me. “Mom why do you keep on turning around and looking at your butt?”

She caught me off guard. I hadn’t realized I was doing it! Once she questioned me, I became aware of a running commentary in my head telling me that my rear end was too wide, and too big.

So what do you do when you become aware of a negative commentary?

Confront the thought: Here’s an example of how I could have confronted that thought so many years ago.

“Who says that my butt is too big? Is it true? Is there a universal rule that says that my butt needs to be a certain size and shape? Where did I get the idea that my shape is less attractive than any other shape? Who says that a big butt is not good? Many people like bigger butts….”

When you begin to confront long held thoughts you are developing the ability to create your own reality.

Let’s create a reality of self-acceptance, gratitude and self-love. Together we can change our culture into an affirming, loving one, starting with ourselves by confronting one thought at a time.

Blessings on your Self-Love Diet 31-day challenge.

Michelle Minero


31-Day Self-Love Writing Challenge

January is Self-Love month, and it marks the 4th year that we’ve hosted the 31-Day Self-Love Writing Challenge. You can participate by submitting your self-love writing to be published on this blog. You can submit your writing here. You can also participate by writing your self-love posts on your own blog and linking back to the 31-Day Self-Love Writing Challenge, 2014 blog post and Facebook event. If you don’t start on January 1st, that’s fine! You can jump into the challenge whenever you want.

Win a Copy of Self-Love Diet: The Only Diet That Works

Each blog post you write is one entry into our random drawing to win an autographed copy of my book, Self-Love Diet: The Only Diet That Works. You’ll also be entered into our drawing to win our upcoming Self-Love e-products that we’ll be announcing soon.

If you don’t feel comfortable sharing your self-love writing, you can write in a journal or write yourself self-love emails. If writing isn’t for you, simply reading others’ self-love writing can be powerful and beneficial to you on your self-love journey.


Michelle Minero, MFT 3Michelle Minero is a licensed marriage family therapist who specializes in eating disorder recovery. Michelle’s book, Self-Love Diet: The Only Diet That Works, was published on January 23, 2013. You can purchase a copy through Amazon. Her dream is to see a world filled with people who love themselves and their bodies.

Michelle created an intensive outpatient eating disorder program in 2000, brought ANAD (Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders, Inc.) to Petaluma shortly after and founded EDRS (Eating Disorder Recovery Support, Inc.), a Marin and Sonoma County based 501(c)3 non-profit organization in 2005. In 2011, Michelle co-founded the Love Warrior Community with her daughter, Emelina, an online community that helps people cultivate self-love, self-acceptance and body acceptance through creative expression. Connect with Michelle on Facebook and Twitter.

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4 Responses to Self-Love Diet Tip #4: Confront Your Thoughts

  1. Pingback: Self-Love Diet Tip #25: Reexamine Your Thoughts | selflovewarrior

  2. Pingback: June Self-Love Diet Challenge | selflovewarrior

  3. Pingback: October Self-Love Diet Writing Prompt: Take That One Next Step | selflovewarrior

  4. Pingback: October Self-Love Diet Writing Prompt: Take That One Next Step | Emelina Minero Writes

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