“Happy Fathers Day” is three words that many of you have heard or said this Father’s Day.
Some of you reading this blog may have eagerly anticipated this day to spend with your father, others of you may be doing your best to forget the significance of this day, and still others may use this day to honor a person who is no longer living.
Whether or not this day is “Happy” for you, the common denominator for all of us is we all have fathers. Some of you may have never known your biological father; others of you may have been loved by him, abused by him or a combination of experiences.
The common goal for all Love Warriors is to practice the Self-Love Diet each and every day by loving ourselves no matter what our past experiences have been.
All our fathers have had an immense impact on our lives one way or another. I hope you have many positive memories of your father. If so, you may have a “jump” on others who did not receive loving care from a father. If you do not have loving memories, I invite you to use the prompt for June to bring more positive thoughts, feelings and actions into your life.
The prompt for this month has been to “fire your judge”; the image I shared in this prompt was of a man with a cigarette hanging from his mouth as he used a measuring tape to measure the hips of a line of beauty contestants. This image symbolized for me the part of myself that has compared my body to other women’s bodies as if there was a competition going on. In a larger context, this image symbolized the judgmental aspect of me that says I am not measuring up. But what happens once you’ve fired your judge? Who do you hire in his/her place?
What if you hired an ethical, compassionate and knowledgeable judge? This part of you would have the job of judging each moment and deciding what the most loving thought and action would be for you.
This is the positive side of the judge. We all need to judge what is best for us. When I suggested that we fire our judges, that was just the first step. The second step is hiring a judge that will be fair, look at all the sides to the situation, seek counsel and make the best, most loving decision for you.
When I was growing up there was a television show called Father Knows Best. Robert Young played a loving, reliable, intelligent and stable father who admitted his mistakes and was able to see life from the perspective of his children. At the end of each episode he would come up with a well thought out solution to the problem in that episode. He was fair, set boundaries, listened to all sides and made sure he thought of the bigger picture. Although I know I would take offense to a show with this title today, because it implies that no one else knows what to do, it was a model of how an engaged and caring father cared for his family.
As we progress on our journey of regularly offering ourselves love, let’s be reminded that there is a loving masculine “father” energy that can be tapped into, which is just as important as the loving feminine “mother” energy.
Blessings on your self-love journey,
Michelle E. Minero
Michelle Minero, the Co-Founder of this blog and the overarching Love Warrior Community published her book, Self-Love Diet: The Only Diet That Works. You can buy her book online or at stores in Petaluma, Sonoma and Healdsburg, California. For upcoming events and book signings, visit Michelle’s Events page.
Michelle Minero is a licensed marriage family therapist who specializes in eating disorder recovery. Michelle’s book, Self-Love Diet: The Only Diet That Works, was published on January 23, 2013. You can purchase a copy through Amazon. Her dream is to see a world filled with people who love themselves and their bodies.
Michelle created an intensive outpatient eating disorder program in 2000, brought ANAD (Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders, Inc.) to Petaluma shortly after and founded EDRS (Eating Disorder Recovery Support, Inc.), a Marin and Sonoma County based 501(c)3 non-profit organization in 2005.
In 2011, Michelle co-founded the Love Warrior Community with her daughter, Emelina, an online community that helps people cultivate self-love, self-acceptance and body acceptance through creative expression. Connect with Michelle on Facebook and Twitter.