I’m entering my very last semester as a college undergraduate. For many of my friends, myself included, this is a terrifying prospect. With only a limited amount of time left in college I’ve decided to try out Team No Regrets. I plan on living each day from here on making decisions based on my own happiness, to forgive myself for the past, and move forward in life.
Recently I’ve become caught up in the day to day intricacies of college life. I worried constantly about my friends, their relationships, my relationships with them, and saw my grades and academics slipping to the side lines. This is not the woman I want to be or the legacy I want to leave behind. Although I can’t change my past actions I can change how I move forward from here. So, one Sunday morning as I lie in my bed digesting my actions from the previous night I decided to do something I’d never done before. I forgave myself. I forgave myself for last night and the things that I had regretted doing and I moved forward. For me this process took about two hours.
Forgiving myself has always been an area of my life that I’ve struggled with. In all of my relationships, romantic or otherwise, I always held myself at a distance from the person. My heart has been broken before and because of this I’ve learned to detach when people try to get too close to me as a defense mechanism. This was so when they let me down I have only myself to blame.
What I finally realized a few weeks ago is that this is not how I want to live my life. I want to live and love loudly. This time of self-reflection has made me feel happier than I have in a few years. If I can’t trust the people I surround myself with then perhaps they should not be in my life. Loving yourself comes from within, but it’s also supported by the love and confidence of close friends.
My journey isn’t over. I struggle everyday to forgive myself for little things but I’m committed to learning and loving all of me. Have you taken time to forgive yourself lately?
– Hannah Carolyn
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My name is Hannah Coleman and I hate talking about myself. My thoughts are fair game but descriptive autobiographies are not my strong suit. That being said, here is a very short explanation of how I see myself. I’m contradictory, loud, opinionated, and infected with an awful case of Wanderlust. I dislike suede and people telling me what I can’t do. I’m currently studying Sociology and finishing my final semester as a Senior in college. I enjoy living my life with honesty and surrounded by good friends. There are a lot of things that I don’t know but what I do know is: I love exploring new places and meeting new people. I love the possibilities found in being introduced to a new song or artist. Above all, I cherish independence. For now I’m taking everything a day at a time. As Bowie said, “I don’t know where I’m going from here, but I promise it won’t be boring.”