Dear Love Warrior Community,
I have been fighting an internal critic inside my head this week. This critic has been up for me the past month and a half and has been louder than it usually is. I am tired of listening to it and its’ obnoxious reasoning and belief that I am not smart enough and am not doing things “good enough.” You see I have been struggling at work with the type of billing I have to do as part of my job. This requires me to be exact and specific with numbers and dates/times and so forth. I often make mistakes and even though I go over my papers several times I don’t often see my mistakes. This has complicated things for me. My critic has been yelling at me that I am not paying close enough attention, working hard enough or am smart enough to do the work I am doing. The truth is I know that I am! You see at a young age I was diagnosed with dyslexia and I have struggled with reading and writing since I can remember. Not many people know this about me as I have kept it hidden from others. The truth is I have felt ashamed about it. I remember in grade school and high school being made fun of when trying to read out loud. Since then I have put much work into supporting myself around these issues and have not struggled with major issues around it until I began my recent job.
I am writing this blog post because I desire to let go of my shame. The truth is I am not stupid—actually I got 4.0 GPA’s all through college. I have learned that each one of us has something that we struggle with…and numbers are mine. So I am choosing to act with self love and acceptance for myself knowing that any given moment I am doing my best, and care about those I work with and my job. I am a dedicated and loving human being that deserves above all my acceptance and love.
What is something you desire to accept about yourself? Is there something you desire to let go of and move through?
I chose to see my dyslexia as a gift not as something that defines me. How about you?
Love and light,
Lindsey Wert is a Marriage and Family Therapist in Sonoma County with special interest in treatment and prevention of eating disorders and sexual trauma. Lindsey’s passions are supporting women in learning how to love themselves from the inside out. Lindsey contributes to her community by giving eating disorder presentations, doing prevention work and supporting the health at every size movement. Visit Lindsey’s personal website, From the Inside Out: Self Love and Transformation