February 12, 2012

Dear Love Warriors,

I want to share a poem I love that applies to my answer of the question WHAT WOULD LOVE DO? Here it is:

To laugh is to risk appearing the fool.
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.
To reach out to others is to risk involvement.
To expose feelings is to risk exposing your true self.
To place your ideas, your dreams before a crowd is to risk their loss.
To love is to risk not being loved in return.
To live is to risk dying.
To hope is to risk despair.
To try is to risk failure.
But risks must be taken,
because the greatest hazard in life is to do nothing.
The person who risks nothing,
does nothing, has nothing, and is nothing.
They may avoid suffering and sorrow,
but they cannot learn, feel, change, grow, love, live.
Chained by their attitudes, they are a slave,
they forfeited their freedom.
Only the person who risks can be free

I have loved this poem for a very long time. I titled my self-love post risk because I believe that a life truly lived is full of risk. On Friday night I risked a lot. For those who know me and my past know that there has been many layers of pain and abuse that have lead me to now have a sexual relationship with another or date. I went out on my very first date this past Friday. I was scared, afraid and my fear told me not to because I was not ready—my fear had also been telling me this for over a decade, so I decided to risk—to risk feeling possibly triggered, vulnerable and pain…and what I found is that I felt these things with love, compassion, while also having a good time. I set my boundaries, was upfront with this person and had a great time. Love had me set my boundaries and be clear about my past and my current state. I could not believe the words that came out of my mouth—I was so very proud of myself, how far I have come, and how far I know I will go….I listened to my spirit and I felt very good at the end of the night—difficult feelings and all.

There is this line in a song I love that says, “And I will only go as fast as the slowest part of me feels safe to go,” and this is WHAT LOVE WOULD DO! Here is to risk and vulnerability!



Lindsey Wert is a Marriage and Family Therapist in Sonoma County with special interest in treatment and prevention of eating disorders and sexual trauma. Lindsey’s passions are supporting women in learning how to love themselves from the inside out. Lindsey contributes to her community by giving eating disorder presentations, doing prevention work and supporting the health at every size movement. Visit Lindsey’s personal website, From the Inside Out: Self Love and Transformation

Check out the Love Warrior Community self-love tools and treat your self to a body positive video, an empowering song, a beautiful piece of artwork or some self-love, body positive inspired writing. 🙂

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