I have a tendency to ask the wrong questions. Here is my list of classic examples.
- “Why don’t I remember to use my Body Love Cream every day?”
- “Why is it so hard to write a daily blog?”
- “Why don’t I do my daily Qi-Gong practice when I know I feel so much better when I do?”
I have a good brain, and when I ask it questions, it obediently goes on the hunt for the answers. It can answer my question about my lackadaisical use of my Body Love Cream by suggesting: “You don’t remember to use it because your memory is getting poor with old age.” Or “You don’t remember to use your cream because you’re hypocritical. You should use it perfectly if you’re asking others to use it daily.”
When I “google” my mind by asking why I don’t remember things, or why things are so hard, or why I don’t do the things I love, I get answers that validate how badly I’m handling things. This does not help me on my path to self-love.
I need to ask the right questions. Here are my new and improved, latest edition, questions:
- “How can I remember to use my Body Love Cream more frequently?”
- “How can I make it easier to get to my goal of daily blogging?”
- “What’s the smallest step I can take towards reviving my Qi-Gong practice?”
Now I’m on track! When I get out of my perfectionistic mindset, and offer myself grace, (which is a good idea since I’m on my self-love journey) I breathe a deep sigh of relief, and instantly feel inspired and motivated to start moving in the direction of love vs. criticism.
So now that I’ve asked myself the right questions, here are my answers:
- I can remember to use my Body Love Cream in the morning by pushing my container out in my line of vision on my bathroom sink before I go to bed. I could even use it at night instead of the morning, which might feel more relaxing.
- To help me get closer to my daily goal of blogging, I can allow myself to feel successful if I’ve written at least once a week, anything over that is instant uber success!
- The smallest step I can take towards my goal of reviving my Qi-Gong practice is to imagine myself doing it before I go to sleep.
Asking the right questions is a self-love tool that always works for me. Guided by self-love, what questions can you ask yourself? Share your answer with the Love Warrior Community by emailing your response to firstname.lastname@example.org
Michelle Minero is a licensed marriage family therapist who specializes in eating disorder recovery. She created an intensive outpatient eating disorder program in 2000, brought ANAD (Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders, Inc.) to Petaluma shortly after and founded EDRS (Eating Disorder Recovery Support, Inc.), a Marin and Sonoma County based 501(c)3 non-profit organization in 2005. In 2011, Michelle co-founded the Love Warrior Community with her daughter, Emelina, an online community that helps people cultivate self-love, self-acceptance and body acceptance through creative expression. Michelle is finishing her book, Self-Love: The Only Diet That Works, and her dream is to see a world filled with people who love themselves and their bodies. Connect with Michelle on Facebook and Twitter and help spread the Self-Love Movement!