Self-Love: Becoming Aware of Fear, Comparison, and Perfectionism and Telling Them To Take a Hike

Self–Love Day 14

I am so grateful that my work as a psychotherapist has rubbed off on me. When I get stuck, it’s not for long. This morning, I was working on the analysis of the competition for my book proposal. I was reading excerpts from Marci Shimoff’s book, Love For No Good Reason. I was getting discouraged. I heard this old tape playing in my head, “She’s a great writer. What makes you think you can write? She’s done such a good job of writing about self-love.  What do you have to add?”

As I began to realize what was happening, I told myself “We all have something to offer, and we all do it in our own unique way. Even though she has written a very good book, look to see how yours is different, and how it has something else to offer.” I began to feel better.

As I continued reading the reviews, and more excerpts, fear came to visit me. It said, “People may criticize your book. How will you feel when they say how lousy it is?”

Fears’ cousin, Comparison, added her two cents, “Marci is a bestselling author. Her book is great, and you’re going to have to work a lot longer to get your book up to snuff. You better start more research, contact other experts in the field, and give your book a thorough overhaul. You’re not even close to writing your book proposal!”  

That’s when I noticed Comparison’s twin sister, Perfectionism, had added her input.

Because my intention is to continue living from Self-Love, I was able to catch myself before my thoughts had done too much damage.

I realize that I’m a new author, but we all have to start somewhere. I do believe I have an important message, and I know I’m the only one who can say it in just the way that I do.

I was also aware that my old scarcity mentality had taken hold of me this morning. I am so grateful that I remembered that there is abundance in this universe. There is room for all of us. My voice can be added to Marci’s and everyone elses’ who is espousing Self-Love. This message needs to be heard loud and clear. The message of Self-Love doesn’t need a single voice; it needs a choir with different voices to give a richness to the message. I’m so grateful to be one of the voices.

You can visit my self-love website to find out more about the Love Warrior Community. It will launch this week. You can visit Daylle Deanna Schwartz’ websiteto take the 31 Days of Self-Love Challenge and to receive her free e-book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count The Ways.



Michelle Minero is a licensed marriage family therapist who specializes in eating disorder recovery. She created an intensive outpatient eating disorder program in 2000, brought ANAD (Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders, Inc.) to Petaluma shortly after and founded EDRS (Eating Disorder Recovery Support, Inc.), a Marin and Sonoma County based 501(c)3 non-profit organization in 2005. In 2011, Michelle co-founded the Love Warrior Community with her daughter, Emelina, an online community that helps people cultivate self-love, self-acceptance and body acceptance through creative expression. Michelle is finishing her book, Self-Love: The Only Diet That Works, and her dream is to see a world filled with people who love themselves and their bodies. Connect with Michelle on Facebook and Twitter and help spread the Self-Love Movement!

Gallery | This entry was posted in Love Warrior Community, Self-Love, Self-Love Challenge and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s