Self-Love: Day 12
Listening to my body is something I developed in the beginning of my recovery. I no longer struggle with deciphering my hunger or satiation signals, but I noticed this evening that I don’t always listen to all of my body’s signals. What I noticed is that I was unconsciously electing to disconnect from my body’s signals connected to my body’s well being.
My throat has been telling me for about a week now that it is getting sore. I’ve taken vitamin C in mega doses. I’ve drank lots and lots of water. I’ve focused chi into my throat at night when I’m in bed, and it’s been going away. I’ve focused on self-love diligently since January 1st, yet tonight, I noticed that when I really want to do something, I can still ignore my body’s signals and push through it.
Tonight is my Circle Sisters women’s circle. We’ve been meeting once a month for 3 years. This evening is special because it’s the first circle of the New Year. I’ve been imagining us all being together, lighting our candles, sitting quietly, meditating together, and picking up our talking stick before we share our hearts, dreams, pains, and joys.
I told myself, “My throat really isn’t bad, although I should probably go to bed early tonight, I’m well enough to go to my women’s circle.”
Self-Love raised its voice to me this evening as I was finishing up my paper work and preparing to move into the next office where we meet once a month. When I was finishing up my return calls and process notes, my attention kept going to a dull throbbing soreness in my throat. Next I was aware of a headache. “Maybe my body is telling me it’s hungry. If I eat, perhaps the headache will go away. I don’t think my throat is really very sore.” As I was eating my dinner, I noticed my muscles in my neck were tender. Self-Love told me, “Listen to me Michelle, I’m telling you to go home and take care of yourself.”
“O.K. body, I get it. You need rest tonight more than my spirit needs the connection with my Circle Sisters.”
With less than an hour before we were scheduled to meet, I called a friend to let her know that I needed to go home and get to bed early. I don’t always like doing the “Self-Love thing” when it comes to putting aside something I was looking forward to, but I’m becoming a much better advocate for my body. Since this is the only body I get, I decided to take good care of it tonight.
Although my recovery from compulsive over eating has taught me to decipher and listen to my hunger and satiation signals, I still have a hard time listening to my body’s wellness signals. When I feel like I’m becoming sick, I disconnect from my body and push through it, when I should be listening to my body and giving it what it needs. Tonight I was able to listen to my body and act out of self-love, and I was able to rest.
You can visit my Self–Love website to find out more about the Love Warrior Community. It will launch this week. You can also visit Daylle Deanna Schwartz’ website to take the 31 Days of Self–Love Challenge and to receive her free e–book, How Do I Love Me? Let Me Count The Ways.
Michelle Minero is a licensed marriage family therapist who specializes in eating disorder recovery. She created an intensive outpatient eating disorder program in 2000, brought ANAD (Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders, Inc.) to Petaluma shortly after and founded EDRS (Eating Disorder Recovery Support, Inc.), a Marin and Sonoma County based 501(c)3 non-profit organization in 2005. In 2011, Michelle co-founded the Love Warrior Community with her daughter, Emelina, an online community that helps people cultivate self-love, self-acceptance and body acceptance through creative expression. Michelle is finishing her book, Self-Love: The Only Diet That Works, and her dream is to see a world filled with people who love themselves and their bodies. Connect with Michelle on Facebook and Twitter and help spread the Self-Love Movement!